Saturday, January 12, 2013

Bucket O' Food List

A belated Happy New Year to you all.

I've made a resolution. I'm definitely going to post more on my blog this year than I did last year. Fortunately, that won't be too difficult. If I manage one more I'll have doubled my output.

But enough about resolutions and writing. I'm here to talk about food.

It's been almost three and a half years since I've had a cigarette. I haven't slipped up one time. Nope. Not once. But, you know, this is not going to be a preachy post. I don't consider myself an ex-smoker anyhow. I consider myself a non-practcing smoker. Once the Death Comet is confirmed to be approaching Earth, I'll be the first one in line at the Smoke Shoppe, looking for a carton of Kents.

I can hear you telling me, “You said we were going to talk about food. All you're talking about is cigarettes.”

Well, that's true to a degree. But I'll urge patience, Grasshopper. It's merely a lead in.

See, when people give up one sin, they often take up another in its place. In my case, I've replaced the cigarettes with food. Mostly carbs or fats. I eat lots of cheese. Fresh croissants are wonderful with butter and blackberry jam. Bagels with cream cheese are good too. If I make a peanut butter sammich, it has to have butter on it too.

You get the picture. The picture is not pretty. It's about fifty pounds heavier than it used to be. It needs to get lighter.

I've decided I've got to combat the carbs and fats, but before I do I need to run through my Bucket O' Food List one time.

What's a Bucket O' Food List, you ask? I know you know that a Bucket List is a list of all the things you want to do before you croak. A Bucket O' Food List is the same thing, except it's only about food. And even though I'm not planning on croaking any time soon, I still see no reason to avoid these delicious food items, especially seeing as though I'm going to have to give them up soon.

So here's my Bucket O' Food List, presented in no particular order:

  1. A shore dinner, including steamed lobster, clams on the half shell and steamers, corn on the cob and roasted 'taters. Lots of butter shall be consumed with this meal.
  2. A Maine blueberry pie.
  3. The above mentioned fresh croissant with butter and blackberry jam.
  4. Chocolate chip cookies.
  5. A boneless leg of lamb, spit roasted medium rare, covered with my mystery dry rub and poked and larded with a bunch of garlic cloves, spinach sprinkled with vinegar (butter added), baked potato with sour cream, chives, salt, pepper, butter.
  6. Home made lemon sherbet.
  7. A complete Thanksgiving dinner, even if it isn't Thanksgiving. No green bean casserole.
  8. Enough cashews in one sitting to seriously hurt me.
  9. A bagel with lox, onions and cream cheese from Zingerman's. And since I'm already there, I'll get a pastrami on rye for dessert.
  10. Three slightly pan seared sea scallops, covered with a pat of sherry butter, and placed on a bed of cous-cous cooked in chicken broth, then mixed with finely chopped green onions and spearmint, grilled thinly sliced eggplant, lightly brushed with olive oil, and a couple of crabcakes from Phillip's Restaurant in Baltimore. All preceded by a shrimp cocktail. And oysters on the half shell. With horseradish, lemon and hot sauce. And don't skimp on the salt and pepper.
  11. A pizza from Bocce's Pizzeria in Buffalo. Double cheese and double pepperoni.
  12. One Beef on Weck, loaded with horseradish, from pretty much any sleazy bar in Buffalo.
  13. An Italian sausage sub with caramelized green peppers and onions.
  14. Hot peach cobbler served with a scoop of homemade vanilla ice cream.

I'll tick these off over time. Yes, I will. And as soon as I'm done I'll be ready to lead an austere life and start shedding the pounds. You'll be proud of me too, won't you?

So what are the foods on your Bucket O' Food List? What do you want to make sure you eat before you croak or swear off good food? Let me know in the comments section. And if it sounds really good I'll not only add it to my list, I'll beg you for the recipe.